What truly defines you as a person?
We all sit back and admire other attributes that another person has, from materialistic to virtuous. No one can say that they are entirely content with themselves. Not at this age.
We all sit in hope, that one day, there will be that one person, who is so similar to you, and yet so different, who enters your life with a light that never dims.
Whether that person is a man, a woman, your best friends or your family.
You bicker, bitch and bite back at each other. But you never stop loving.
Does the love that we share help create our definitions?
It is said that to be well-rounded people, we should be able to hate and love in equal amounts, but I don’t believe in this. Everyone has the capacity to do both, oh yes that goes without saying, but it is my reasoning that what makes us said “well-rounded” people is that we are able to transform that self-destructive hate…
into love.
Personally, I quite regularly, almost hourly, wish that I were more like someone else. Immediately regretting perhaps my short-tempered outburst, roll of the eyes, or quick judgment of character. Or that stupidly loud laugh that just erupted out of my mouth like a caged bird finally making a mad dash for the sky. Or that exceedingly off-the-cuff remark I gave that came out insultingly. But I’m not a think-before-act person, I never have been, and I’ve always been loud, it’s hereditary, and the remarks I sometimes give are just in essence the truth that no one else has the balls to say. Someone has to say it.
I’ve noticed in re-reading some of my posts, that I am rather cynical… So for me to even possibly utter something so extravagant as turning hate into love, is one of those “one small step for man…” moments.
But my cynicism is my form of cocoon. In my cynical state of pessimism, no man can hurt me. I’ve learned the very hard way to keep my friends at arms distance, as I will never put myself in the position that I was in six months ago. It still hurts, but I’m dealing with it. As I’ve mentioned before, the way we handle and deal with situations, are what defines us as human beings, not being able to love or hate more than another person.
Sometimes I wish I were more quiet, more thoughtful, more intelligent and even more tanned, but I know that I can never really achieve these high expectations for myself, because I’ve a voice like a fog-horn, am too self-centered, too damn lazy and I burn like a bitch. But I can accept these factors, because I know that other people have accepted them in me too.
So perhaps another definition is our friends, people whom, just like our families, we take so often for granted.
I guess the people who truly define you, are the people who know you better than you know yourself and wouldn’t change one tiny aspect for all the tea in China.
The people who try to change you, aren’t worth your breath. The people who love you for you, and who you, in turn, love them for being them, are the ones you keep with you, from freshers week, to your stag and hen nights, to your wedding day, to the birth of your children and to the very end.
They are the people.
They are your people.
They define you.
S.E.M
